French Revolutionaries Online
by Undomiel Malfoy
Summary: Something different, though not that different...The characters of Les Mis get the internet
1. Marius sends a survey

* It seemed like it would be a nice change to do some non-dramatic, non-  
HP fic. So. Away We Go... ________________________________________________________________________  
  
*Basics*  
  
Name: Marius Pontmercy  
  
Age: 21  
  
Marital Status: Cosette! Cosette! I love Cosette! Cosette! Cosette!  
  
Occupation: Student and part-time Revolutionary (but not one of the hot ones).  
  
**Favorites**  
  
Favorite Food: Tacos...I love tacos.  
  
Favorite Color: Pink.  
  
Favorite Book: I like Harlequin Romance books ::nod::  
  
Favorite Movie: Anything romantic or scary. So that Cosette will cuddle up to me.  
  
Favorite Time of Day: Mid-morning  
  
***Friends***  
  
Who is your best friend? Well...I'd Have to say Cosette is my best friend, I love her! OH I LOVE HER!  
  
What would your friends most likely say to you? Well. Cosette would probably say "Oh Marius! I love you!" and Enjolras and the rest of l'Aimes d'ABC would probably just say "Shut UP Marius."  
  
What would your friends most likely say about you? Well.. Cosette would say how much she loves me...I think Enjolras would probably say "He needs to shut up about that stupid girl!" but she's NOT a stupid girl! And just because he can't get any that's no reason to be jealous.  
  
****This or That****  
  
Red or Black: Red! The color of desire!  
  
Here or There: Wherever Cosette is!  
  
Morning or Night: Morning  
  
Coke or Pepsi: Coke  
  
Fruit or Vegetables: Vegetables  
  
Hot or Cold: Hot...like Cosette! 


	2. Cosette responds

From: Marius Pontmercy MluvsC4ever@parismail.com  
  
To: Cosette whosmydaddy@secrethouse.net  
  
Subject: Survey!1!!!!!!!11!!  
  
Name: Cosette  
  
Age: 17  
  
Marital Status: Marius Pontmercy + Cosette = Love forever!  
  
Occupation: Housewife, Whine  
  
**favorites**  
  
Favorite Food: Celery.  
  
Favorite Color: Black. Like my dress. My ONLY Dress.  
  
Favorite Book: The Bible, because I'm a good Christian girly... Until my papa  
  
turns his back, then I rip out pages and turn them into spit wads. What? It gets so boring all alone in that house...  
  
Favorite Movie: Pocahontas! For some odd reason... [Watch the video.]  
  
Favorite Time of Day: In the afternoons, because they remind me of when I  
  
used to go on walks with papa and I get to see that crazy lovesick fool,  
  
Marius when he was stalking me.  
  
***friends***  
  
Who's your best friend? Marius - he's the only one that didn't die, right? I mean...it's weird to be friends with dead guys. Though...Marius still is....  
  
What would your friends most likely say to you? "Oh Cosette, I love you, I  
  
couldn't live without you, may I lick the ground you walk on?" the like.  
  
What would your friends most likely say about you? "She's the greatest  
  
thing that ever happened to me" I suppose.  
  
****This or That****  
  
Red or Black: Black, like I said. Because it's the color of my only dress.  
  
Here or There: Anywhere outside that musty old house.  
  
Morning or Night: Night, because it reminds me of those days when Marius  
  
used to sneak into the garden, almost set off the alarm, alert the guard  
  
dogs, cause papa to slink around and paranoidly think it's Javert...  
  
Coke or Pepsi: Pepsi, dur. What kind of a lady drinks coke? Pepsi really  
  
brings on the belches.  
  
Fruit or Vegetables: Fruit. Like peaches remind me of Marius. Not saying  
  
he's fat. He's just...soft. And fuzzy.  
  
Hot or Cold: Hot. Because...ner...nevermind. 


	3. Eponine

* I love you all*  
  
From: Eponine Thenardier. raindoesnthurt@streetrat.com   
  
To: L'aimes d'ABC Hotrevolutionaries@barricades.net  
  
Subject: Survey!1!!!!!!!11!!  
  
Name: Eponine Thenardier, 'Ponine  
  
Age: 16  
  
Marital Status: Stupid Marius. Should have picked me.  
  
Occupation: Letter delivery girl, secret house finder, professional dead girl.  
  
**favorites**  
  
Favorite Food: Ice. Because it's made of water. Like Rain.  
  
Favorite Color: White. Because I hate Cosette.  
  
Favorite Book: Snow White. Because they think she's dead but she wakes up from her lovers kiss.  
  
Favorite Movie: Moulin Rouge. Because she dies at the end and is taken away from her love.  
  
Favorite Time of Day: Night, when everybody else is sleeping.  
  
***friends***  
  
Who's your best friend? ::sigh:: My memories of Marius are my best friends.  
  
What would your friends most likely say to you? I don't talk to myself....Much.  
  
What would your friends most likely say about you? "Don't you fret dear Eponine..." over and over. Memories you see.  
  
****This or That****  
  
Red or Black: Red. The color of blood. Which I had on me when I died in Marius' arms.  
  
Here or There: Wherever my love is.  
  
Morning or Night: Night, so I can wander the streets. Wait. I do that all day.  
  
Coke or Pepsi: Coke. I hate Cosette.  
  
Fruit or Vegetables: Fruit, in crepes. What? I'm French.  
  
Hot or Cold: Cold! Like my body! 


	4. Enjolras!

~Thanks for the reviews, I love you all~  
  
From: Enjolras. 19thCent_Hottie@tablespeeches.com   
  
To: Jeahn poeticinfluence@minorcharacter.org  
  
Subject: Survey!1!!!!!!!11!!  
  
Name: Just call me Enjolras. Or Enjy if you must.  
  
Age: 21  
  
Marital Status: Pah! Who needs Women when you've got REVOLUTION!  
  
Occupation: Student, Leader of the aimes d'ABC, WOO! Les aimes d'ABC 4EVER!  
  
**favorites**  
  
Favorite Food: Food? Who needs food! Ok. I do. I'm rather fond of chocolate soufflé actually.  
  
Favorite Color: RED! The Blood of Angry men! And BLACK the dark of ages past!  
  
Favorite Book: How To Subvert the Government and Look Hot Doing It.  
  
Favorite Movie: The Patriot!  
  
Favorite Time of Day: Whenever I have an audience for a speech.  
  
***friends***  
  
Who's your best friend? I am my own best friend! Well, ok, so I'm pretty close to all of the aimes. But I'm the best.  
  
What would your friends most likely say to you? "Oh! Enjolras! That was a WONDERFUL speech!" or perhaps "Ohh....pretty dancing lemurs!" the latter from Grantaire.  
  
What would your friends most likely say about you? They'd say that I'm a great leader and that I give wonderful speeches. And maybe that I'm hot too.  
  
****This or That****  
  
Red or Black: Both! Both! Both!  
  
Here or There: Here! I will stand and FIGHT!  
  
Morning or Night: As I said. Give me an audience, and I'm happy.  
  
Coke or Pepsi: Uhm. Uhm. Uhm. They both have red on them...I'll say Pepsi though, 'cause it's got Red White and Blue on it. And those are the colors of France! And they will be the colors of free France as well!  
  
Fruit or Vegetables: Fruit. It tastes good.  
  
Hot or Cold: Hot! Like the fire in my soul!  
  
~Authors note...or hot...like your body...~ 


	5. Confessions of a Drunkard

From: Grantaire Wino4Ever@doublea.com   
  
To: Enjolras 19thCent_Hottie@tablespeeches.com   
  
Subject: Survey!1!!!!!!!11!!  
  
Name: Grantaire  
  
Age: 22!!  
  
Marital Status: I...I...I Love Wine...  
  
Occupation: Wine connis...conisu...drinker guy  
  
**favorites**  
  
Favorite Food: Food! Ha! Solid food is for WIMPS! Wine!  
  
Favorite Color: Dark Red...like wine!  
  
Favorite Book: 101 Ways to Drink Wine to the Point of Passing Out  
  
Favorite Movie: A Wine For All Seasons  
  
Favorite Time of Day: When Enjolras gives his speeches and I can lie on the floor drinking.  
  
***friends***  
  
Who's your best friend? Erm. My wine glass!  
  
What would your friends most likely say to you? "Put the bottle DOWN!"  
  
What would your friends most likely say about you? Uh. They don't understand the love between my wine and I...  
  
****This or That****  
  
Red or Black: Red...like Red Wine.  
  
Here or There: Here. I have wine here.  
  
Morning or Night: Night, because It's less odd to pass out at night...  
  
Coke or Pepsi: Pop is for Losers! Drink Wine!  
  
Fruit or Vegetables: Fruit! Grapes especially.  
  
Hot or Cold: Hot! So wine tastes cooler.  
  
~Sorry if this chapter sucks...~ 


	6. Javert!

From: Javert. DaJavvie@gottafindhim.com   
  
To: Valjean ontherun@secrethouse.org  
  
Subject: Survey!1!!!!!!!11!!  
  
ARG! I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR STUPID SURVEYS! But if it means you'll leave me alone...I'll fill it out...  
  
Name: Inspector Javert.  
  
Age: 47  
  
Marital Status: I don't have time for women, I have felon to chase.  
  
Occupation: Police Chief.  
  
**favorites**  
  
Favorite Food: Cheese. I like cheese.  
  
Favorite Color: Green  
  
Favorite Book: Runaway Convicts and the Men Who Chase Them.  
  
Favorite Movie: The Green Mile. I love that Percy.  
  
Favorite Time of Day: Night, when the stars fill the sky.  
  
***friends***  
  
Who's your best friend? No time for friends. Criminal on the run.  
  
What would your friends most likely say to you? I don't have friends!  
  
What would your friends most likely say about you? I STILL don't have friends! But, if I did they would say that I am the best inspector ever.  
  
****This or That****  
  
Red or Black: Black, like the sky at night.  
  
Here or There: There! Wherever he hides I will find him!  
  
Morning or Night: Night. Stars.  
  
Coke or Pepsi: Coke. Pepsi is the drink of revolutionaries.  
  
Fruit or Vegetables: Vegetables, good for you.  
  
Hot or Cold: Cold, like the river seine.  
  
~I'm on a roll~ 


	7. My Little Runaway? Valjean!

From: Valjean   
To: Chain Gang   
Subject: Survey!1!11!

Name: MY NAME IS JE…er sorry. Jean Valjean.

Age: I've changed my identity so much…I…I don't quite remember.

Marital Status: Ah, if only a heart full of love were mine.

Occupation: Fugitive

favorites

Favorite Food: Bread. The kind you don't get sent to jail for.

Favorite Color: Orange

Favorite Book: 376 Best Places To Hide in 19th Century France.

Favorite Movie: The Fugitive

Favorite Time of Day: Night. When Javert sleeps.

friends

Who's your best friend? I am solitary, but in heaven I have Fantine.

What would your friends most likely say to you? I hear nothing simply faint whispers in the dark

What would your friends most likely say about you? I still don't hear anything buddy.

This or That

Red or Black: Black like the cloak of darkness!

Here or There: Here! Where I may hide!

Morning or Night: Morning, a night of hiding makes one tired.

Coke or Pepsi: Neither really. I'm actually rather fond of Root Beer.

Fruit or Vegetables: Fruit is sweet like…freedom!

Hot or Cold: Hot…bread!

I'm BACK!


End file.
